The Worst Birthday Dinner of All Time

Nash and I spent most of Wednesday sleeping and catching up to East Coast time. Then we began the most important task of all, getting caught up on our tivo shows. Thursday and Friday were spent unpacking, geing through mail, yuck, bills, and getting caught up on email, and beginning to plan the future of Laugh For Sight.

And now we are finally caught up on blogging, which brings me to yesterday, Saturday.

My cousins, Erica and Jessica, my sister Tracey, and niece Siena wanted to take me out for dinner for my birthday which on Tuesday. Yes, I know, that is an awful lot of estrogen to be around at one time. We decided to go out for dinner in Livingston, NJ near where my sister lives, and that I would head out there with my cousins, and that is where the adventure began.

I had to meet  my cousin Erica at 42nd St. and 8th Ave. Did I mention with the wind chill that it was ten degrees outside. So Nash and I bundled up, well, actually, I bundled up, and I had hoped that Nash had grown his winter coat back, as he was a shedding machine while we were in L.A. Nash and I got to 42nd street pretty quickly, as he was in solid working mode. We had to wait for my cousin for about 15 minutes in the freezing cold. If only this would have been the worst part of the evening, than the evening would have been quite nice.

We got on a bus at Port Authority to head to my cousin Jessica’s boyfriend Matt’s apartment which is about a ten minute bus ride. As we boarded the bus, I heard the bus driver say to Erica, “no dogs!” I didn’t have to say a word, as Erica handled it for me telling the bus driver Nash is a guide dog. You would think the bus driver who go from NYC to NJ would be able to recognize a guide dog upon seeing them, but go figure, NJ Transit must not train their bus drivers as well as Guiding Eyes trains their guide dogs. We got to Matt’s pretty quickly, and he leant us his car. Erica, Jessica, Nash, and I piled in, and headed off for Livingston, NJ.  Oh before we got into the car, Matt gave Erica a bunch of directions on what she had to do to work the stick shift of the 1999 Honda. My only reaction to all of the instructions were, “seriously dude, we’re taking this death trap!” We sat in traffic for a little bit getting on to the NJ Turnpike, and you wouldn’t believe the noist the death trap made, it sounded like an airplane. I was like, time for a tune up Matt, and it ends up he actually just had it tuned up not to long ago. Not to worry, I have been in junkier cars over the years. We finally got on the turnpike, and we made it threw the first toll, then after the toll, the car began puttering at about 35 mph on the NJ Turnpike, which going that slow is an accident waiting to happen. Then Erica pulled over to the shoulder to restart the gears, and sure enough the car would not go into first gear. She kept trying this several times, but the car kept going backwards. Now, when you are blind, and stuck on a car on the NJ Turnpike, or any freeway, it is a pretty unsettling feeling, as you can feel the big ass trucks flying by, but you cannot tell how close they are to you. Yeah, its lots of fun. So, Jessica called Matt to let him know the car was dead. Matt was understandbly not happy, but in Erica’s defense, she didn’t do anything wrong. We were just the lucky ones who were in the car for its final run. Erica then sat on the phone with triple A for a good 20 minutes, only to eventually be told that they cannout come onto the highway, and that we had to call Highway Patrol. You would think the first operater she spoke to would have said that. We then sat on hold with highway patrol, and then waited, and waited, and waited, and waited. It took about an hour, all the time, Nash was chillin in the back seat with Jessica. He was pretty good for the most part, although he did start to groan, as it was getting near his dinner time, and when Nash wants to eat, he wants to eat. No matter what time I wake up in the morning, come 630 pm, Nash begins to get a little impatient, as he knows it is nearing dinner time. What does he have a sun dial or something, as he does it every day. So finally, the highweay patrol tow truck showed up. Hey, Nashee, your and my first ride in a tow truck. It was a big leap for Nash to get into the truck, but he got in with the rest of us. The car was hooked up, and we were taken to the next exit and to the Walmart at the next exit. We then got to wait for Matt to get there with his Triple A card. He arrived shortly after we did with a friend of his who drove him out. Oh boy, an exciting evening for them, and a great way to spend a night going out for a birthday dinner. Did I mention that it was ten degrees out during all of this? Oh, and you didn’t think that was the end of it.

Once Matt arrived, I gave Nash his dinner. I figured since we were going out for my birthday, at least one of us should get to eat. It was now about 7pm, and I had left my apartment at 415 to head to my sisters. After Nash finished his dinner, we got him into the back of the SUV, and I thought Nash would only get to ride in the back of SUV’s in Cali. He likes riding in the back as long as I am close. We then began the wait for the Triple A tow truck. Yes, two tow trucks! Great system they got going here. At least the heat in the SUV worked a lot better than the heat in the dead car and the first tow truck. After about an hour of waiting, the second tow truck showed up. The got Matt’s pile of junk hooked up, and off back to Matt’s apartment we headed.

We got back there, and I just really wanted to get back to the city. I was freezing, tired, and freezing. Erica and Jessica both agreed, lets just go back to the city. Oh boy, we get to wait outside for the bus to arrive! Did I mention that it was ten degrees outside? We waited with the drunk Jersey hooligans who were heading into the city for a night of debauchery, and all I could think about was sitting on my warm couch undnerneath a blankie! Oh boy, now I get to get on the bus and feel like the bridge and tunnel crowd. Sorry Jersey folks, but it isn’t like you havent been called that before. We got back to the city and were going to go out to eat, but as soon as we started walking torwards my apartment, the wind kicked up. I was thinking how nice it would be to have a nice warm drink somewhere, but after we got about five blocks, I said, “would you guys mind doing this another night?” I couldn’t feel my fingers, and I think hypthermia was kicking in. Yes, I do not think I have ever been this cold. Nash was just trotting along. Good to see the weather doesn’t affect him. So to recap, to celebrate my birthday which isn’t until Tuesday, I took a bus, then a car, broke down, took a tow truck, then a SUV, then a bus, then walked the ten blocks in ten degree weather all while not getting to eat! Its safe to say that on my actual birthday, I will not be going to New Jersey!

4 Responses to “The Worst Birthday Dinner of All Time”

  1. Barbara Fischler Says:

    The only good thing to say is your birthday is sure memorable! I certainly hope the real day is better. Of course, Nash, must have enjoyed the cool weather…Happy 2days before the big day!!!

  2. blindgator Says:

    Lets just say that I won’t be going to Jersey on my actual birthday!

  3. Linda Damato Says:

    Hey Brian – Hope your real birthday is awesome. Happy Birthday and say hello to Nash for me!

  4. blindgator Says:

    Thanks for the bday wish, and Nash waves a paw hello

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